The Persona: The Story So far...

I quote; “To be, or not to be, that is the question.” by William Shakespeare

A very good afternoon to all of you (or is it morning or evening? Or a good night maybe? Well, never mind, you get the idea). Sorry if the punch line a little bit cheesy but still, that is one of the things you’ll learn in public speaking- taking the attention of the audience. Well, I’m not an attention seeker but it’s good to have your attention.

Alhamdulillah, all praise to Allah, it’s been a year since I started this blog and here I am still actively blogging (like I don’t have anything else to do this winter break). You may notice my first English entry after so many post. So, why in English? Well, why not? I like to keep something afresh. Also since it been about 2 years leaving English literature (after SPM and foundation in science) and opting for medical English (for example let’s try Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis or in simple term, lung inflammation due to silica), I need to know how my English writing fare for now. Hopefully it’s still okay and sorry in advance for my poor writing.

To celebrate this blog first anniversary and a special day for a special someone this month, I would like to share the important things that I learned since taking medicine here in Egypt.

The first and most important thing I learn this year and a half studying in Egypt is SINCERITY. Yes, sincerity or the virtue to speak and act truly of our own feelings, thoughts, and desire or just pure honesty. Truthfully, it’s not that I don’t understand sincerity before, but I never realise its true meaning and how much with just this one virtue can really affect my whole life. Sincerity is something that is keeping me feeling alive and giving me self-control throughout the year. To accept, to forgive, to tolerate, to cherish, to respect, to cooperate, to thank, to share, to sacrifice, to understand, to love and to feel, all of these are meaningless without sincerity coming from our heart. I think THIS can help clear some thought about what I’m talking about. Now, my question is, what are we fighting for? There must be something more if we thoroughly think about it. For example, although studying medicine is really challenging but with sincerity, everything will be much easier and less stressful (trust me). Think of it as an enjoyment or the opportunity to learn something new. So, we can keep on studying/working over and over again without the feeling of regret or fed up. Anyway, studying is not just for passing the examination or getting a degree. Studying is solely on getting the knowledge that would serve us now or in the future. Keep in mind what is more important and that grades does not make you a good doctor but passion is. Don’t just think about doing what is necessary but also think about doing the right thing and if you make a mistake, don’t be afraid to correct it. All in all, love what you do and everything will fall in place. Also, if you are unhappy and insincere about your job, just do it and keep on fighting. After all, it is your responsibility. =P

The second is about DREAMS. First, please ask yourself this: What do you aim in life? And where are you now? For example, one of your dreams is to become a doctor. After you graduate and working as a doctor, so, what now? You’ll have other keen desire like becoming a specialist. After that? Marriage. Then? Having kids of your own. Then what? Seeing your children succeed? To be very rich and wealthy? Driving/riding the fastest supercar/superbike? Having a beautiful mansion/private island? Bearing the simple honorary title of Dato’ or just the simple title of grandparent? Serving humanity? Then, dreaming of dying? (just kidding). Something is amiss here. It’s like dreams that keep on changing; fragile and friable, don’t you think? But first, don’t get the wrong idea here, having an ideal is a noble thing and I respect that. So, having this thought, I know I have to find an answer to this puzzle. Well, everyone has their own answer but for me, my answer is seeking Jannah (Paradise). It’s a dream that I can keep on longing for my whole life. A dream reflecting every thoughts and actions. To be good and to do good for the price that everything we longs for in this world, will be there in Paradise. Anyway, everyone want to go to Paradise but the question here is, what will we do to deserve it?

Third is about ISLAMIC KNOWLEDGE. This really taken me by surprise. The things we learn in SPM is nothing compared to the vast Islamic knowledge out there. Getting knowledge is not just in the classroom or textbook only, but other ways as well. 'Good job' getting A+ for Islamic studies but still not close to grasp the true meaning to be a Muslim. Astaghfirullah, I felt so ashamed. However, let us all be thankful that Allah still giving us the opportunity of perfecting our knowledge and perfecting our faith. I think THIS can help. Alhamdulillah, here, the chances to get Islamic knowledge are good. We can just go to the mosque, meet up with the sheikh or even participate/volunteer in any programs held by associations such as PMRAM, PERUBATAN, IKRAM or ISMA (nothing to do with politics here). For me, I still got a long way to go. Frankly, everything that revolve around us is Islam. If you really want to take a knock in the head (seriously), you should try reading the Quran translation. After all, the Quran is the most interesting and enlightening book you’ll ever read. Keep in mind that the most important thing about faith is that don’t let others discourage you. Just say; “O Allah, You are my Lord, no one has the right to be worshipped except You, You created me and I am your servant and I abide to your covenant and promise as best as I can, I take refuge in you from the evil of which I committed. I acknowledge your favour upon me and I acknowledge my sin, so forgive me, for verily no one can forgive sin except you.”

Furthermore, living in a foreign country, embracing new culture and meeting new people, living in Egypt is still not the same as living in Malaysia (or any country for that matter). So, FRIENDS do play an important role in keeping us settle down and living comfortably in this new environment. Surprisingly, the Malaysian students here are mostly kind and warm. Selflessly help those who is in need of an assistance. I’m thankful to have you guys as my coursemate, labmate and also my housemate. It’s good to have friends that we can trust and rely on to watch each other backs because living here, that is all the help we can get. When we are together, nothing can stop us. For my friends staying in Malaysia, although we were thousands of mile apart. I’ll always remember the bonds between us. All the joys and laughter, reminiscent the memories we gain really set up my mood. I do cherish every moment of it especially from my dear late friends. Although we sometimes not see eye to eye but in the end, we’re still friends and I appreciate the company. It’s true that I can live by myself but still I can’t stand living alone. Thanks for being there and supporting me all this time. =)

There are other lessons that I learned but I’ll get to them later. After traveling and seeing the world, with the experience and knowledge gained, it’s safe to say that I matured myself. To anyone who wants to broaden their horizon of thinking, I really recommend you start earning and start saving money to travel around the world. There are many things that this world can offer.

Also, for my families and teachers that guide and teach me to be whom I am today, I am really grateful. From the bottom of my heart, I sincerely thank you. Alhamdulillah, I’m in fine feathers and happy studying here at Al-Azhar University. Please pray for our success. =)

"Then which of the Blessings of your Lord will you both (jinns and men) deny?" 55:13

Actually, I’m still a bit shy sharing my thought and writing with all of you but still to let others understand, sometimes you need to speak up for yourself. Once again sorry for the bad English. It’s not easy getting Band 6 in MUET nowadays (not that it matters anyway). Insha’Allah, I’ll improve it step by step and from time to time (my Arabic too). I just hope that my writing will benefit you in any way.

Oh, a little bit of reminder to my future self, don’t regret the decisions you may or may not make. After all, Allah has the best interest for us. Also, pretty please with cherry on top, don’t just work smart but also work hard.